My life in dot points

Its all I can manage... But here are some questions Life has thrown at me lately.

• Is it wrong to expect 24 year olds to silence their girlfriends during sex? Its been going on for 4 months now. When I was a girl I would have been mortified to think anyone would hear my activities....let alone be able to determine exactly how many orgasms constitutes a multiple event. Don't want to repress anyone's sensual life. Teensy bit of pride in son's ... um ... talents. Don't want to engender shame. It wouldn't be my shame anyhow. Just DON'T. Want. To. Hear. It. Any. More. Someone I was lamenting the situation to told me, "Laura, some women will come in a stiff breeze". Yes. So I hear. (sigh). Terse SMS war already on the issue. Repeated approaches to son to keep it down. Will I still be seeing this young woman at family meals with my grandchildren in 40 years time? Son's final university exam tomorrow. Am I a Bad, Disloyal, Enabling Mother? Or am I just being 'dissed'? Discuss.

• Just how much stuff does one really need? Is it in inverse proportion to the amount of floorspace available for the purposes of walking around? (phew, moved out 4 crates of Stuff today, it helps already).

• How long does one wait for midwifery models of care to shift? How does one bite one's tongue at the backroom discussions undermining women's desire for non-interventionist birth? Will I be happier in the long run just going independent and taking the blood pressure pills, being my own boss, and paying through the nose for PI insurance. Should I just move to New Zealand? How long is a piece of string? You get the idea. I'm doing a major review next week to take a snapshot of my career/practice so far. Why does one always feel ready to be shot down in flames. Am I trying to run before I can walk?

• How will we face another major surgery for our daughter? This will be a biggie with the potential to really improve her life, but it won't be easy. It has come as a surprise, sort of. She's had similar surgery twice before, but doesn't remember it. I do. Gulp.

• How good is it to have friends who love and support you? And listen to your whining. And write loving things about you. And share bookclub with you. And paint with you. And go to Vegas with you. I truly am blessed.

• On a lighter note.....How good is this? Now these girls really know how to shop. And I thought I had good op-shops near me.

• Will we all be fit and well enough for our trip? All four of us are limping or crippled in some aspect. This is lame (literally). We are all ready to feel well again. I am certainly sick of keeping the doctors in business, nice people though they are. I will keep taking (all) the tablets. Calm blue ocean. Calm blue ocean.

• How will I pack? For 4 people, heading in 3 different directions at the end, for Sydney, Melbourne and Central Australia.

Bearing in mind that one must be alive to complain, and that we live in a well resourced country, with no war, and plentifully stocked supermarkets, and that our children have survived childhood, and that we have careers and sufficient income to service our whining whitebread world, and that I may just delete this whole post because I am so sick of the sound of my whining......answers on a postcard please.

Recycled homes

This is a fabulous article and slideshow.

I saw it and pinched it from Rixa.

http://www.nytimes.com/slideshow/2009/09/02/garden/20090903-recycled-slideshow_index.html

The homes he builds are just stunning! They would make me consider moving.

Granny love

Did I show you the granny square crochet rug I found?

Its a biggish lap size, not quite single bed size. I just love it.

Interview me

My turn. (gulp) I volunteered via Rhubarb Whine. I've also seen it recently on Chapter III, Frogdancer, and others.



Bloggers volunteer to be subjects, and then you send them five probing questions by email. So here are my answers to the five questions Rhubarb asked me. In return, I invite any of you to email me or leave a comment saying ‘interview me’, and I’ll ask you five searing questions (I'll try not to embarass anybody).





1. You make references to op shopping fairly regularly. Laura, what is it about op shops that have you hooked, and what is your best ever find?
They are retail therapy at their most affordable. They involve recycling. Someone once loved that stuff, I might too, although there is frequently some very unloveable stuff. Mostly I love the thought of being able to get great quality fabrics, that are different from current fabric full-price, that makes interesting bags, quilts, etc. Its my own version of limited edition!

Some of it is nostalgia. My depression glass collection is a case in point. I only collect the clear heavier stuff, although I do have a soft spot for the glasses with a coloured bottom half with etched top bands from the fifties (my Nanna had them). I also inherited a gorgeous glass bowl of that era from my late mother-in-law (whom I never met) which was squarish, yet a folded up circle with curved semicircular top edges. It was broken by someone (18 yrs ago) while they were doing my washing up (bless them) and I miss it to this day. I s'pose I hope I'll find another one.

Best bargains? A Zegna tweed coat (made in Italy from Australian wool) for my son a few weeks ago for $8. Another Zegna suit spotted for $25 - not bought, my husband doesn't wear double breasted suits. Fabric galore, many designer business/casual shirts for a song, ostensibly for cutting up for quilts/bags but many snaffled for hubby. Op-shops are the place to buy your knitting needles (does their experience rub off?) and classic sewing patterns for next to nothing. And of course the recent Xmas tree banditry!

Yesterday I found another pretty glass bowl just right for jelly, in a pattern I hadn't seen before. And a small fabric bag with a lighthouse on it!

2. You are so very passionate in your writing, about your career and work in midwifery. If Government powers enabled huge funding additions to your speciality nursing, what would you like to see it spent on? Why?

First, can I pickily point out that midwifery is a separate profession to nursing and that one doesn't need to be a nurse in order to be a midwife. That said, I have no regrets about my dual qualifications.

I would love to see women better educated about the role of the midwife in the provision of care to child-bearing women. In Australia if a woman wants to see the same carer throughout her pregnancy - because these things do and should matter - then she will mostly attend a private obstetrician, because the medical and health insurance system is weighted that way in this country. There are very few private health insurance providers that offer coverage for the engagement of a private midwife to provide antenatal care, intrapartum care (labour and birth) and postnatal care. Yet a midwife is able to do all this for a well woman experiencing a normal pregnancy. Where there are conditions that fall outside the scope of 'normal' a midwife will refer for another opinion from a obstetrician colleague, who may be able to treat/advise/manage the arising condition and return her to the care of the midwife for the remainder of the pregnancy or who will take over the care for longer standing/more complex problems.

When it comes to labour and birth, women are also at the mercy of the funding models. Medicare provider numbers, i.e. the ability to raise a fee for consulting or service provided in the health system are currently restricted to doctors. Unfortunately most of the services that a midwife is qualified to offer a woman, so is a doctor - who can charge a fee for which the woman receives a rebate from the government. This is a Federal funding issue. And the rights to practice in a public hospital are also (in the vast majority) restricted to doctors. So there is an overlap of practise where the woman does not receive a rebate for services from midwife A, but gets one from doctor B. Who gets the market share do you think?

The largesse you have created for the purposes of this interview could be spent on Medicare provider numbers for midwives, opening more birthing centres; where well, low-med risk women can give birth with good medical back-up is available in case of need to transfer (for meconium, excessive pain, obstructed labour) and encourage women to use water immersion for labour and birth. Of course the government will find it saves them money in the long run, with a much lower CS rate. (ooh, is that the sound of a hobby horse galloping off into the distance?)

Of course, two to three generations ago, around half of babies were born at home. There was less dependence on doctors as saviours and more just getting on with it. No epidurals, no restrictions on labour and birth due to CTG monitoring. CS was used pretty judiciously as an emergency. Breech babies were just born. Women had more children then, compared to now, where our hopes per se are tied to fewer eggs in our baskets. Food for thought, but the intervention and CS rate is unacceptably high. I blame the insurance companies and the American obsession with suing people, which has been contagious worldwide and leads to excessive risk management in practice. Then again, its not usually my ass being sued.

Moving on.

3. On the subject of careers, you often refer to your 'late' entry into the field. Inquiring minds want to know other jobs you have over the years - from the sublime to the ridiculous. Anything noteworthy or 'out there' to confess to?

Was hired as an elephant rider in the circus once - is that what you mean? Never got to do it cos I couldn't travel for the next two months, I had to go back to uni. I did work at the same circus as an usherette though, and had a great two weeks in the Big Top amid the sawdust!

Other jobs include: phlebotomist, bakery assistant icing the Jubilee Twists, babysitter, silver-service waitress in the 80's hey-dey restaurant the Mediterranean, Barmaid, projection assistant at the drive-ins, (I saw Close Encounters of the Third Kind 23 times), professional dancer in the 'white slave circuit' in Asia (I had my head screwed on, I had a ball though)...umm...lab technician in a USDA agricultural biochemistry lab in Wisconsin isolating and analysing the proteins from the endosperm of barley with applications for brewing (yes I did understand that sentence), Dressing up as a giant novelty character for a shopping centre promotion for icecream, chemistry tutor, belly dancer, proof reader, acting patient advocate for a large public children's hospital...how long have you got? I have never been out of work when I wanted it.

4. You are a textile junkie and love crafts and fabrics. Your passion for crafts is often referred to. Laura - is there anything you cannot do or wish you could do?

I am NOT the most original painter, or drawer either. I really am quite bad at knitting, but DID knit 3 things for myself in my teens, and a jumper each for my children, all of which were not laughable. I haven't given up yet. I've never tried lace-making but I'm not holding my breath. I am capable of most tasks I set my mind to. Can't quite be assed to get into scrapbooking, its a bit formulaic and often a bit twee for my taste, but I'm willing to incorporate elements as multi-media creations (she says pretentiously). I do now own quite a large collection of said elements (thanks to my sis for an awesome Xmas present) that are waiting to be fallen upon in a quiet creative moment as yet unscheduled. They're non-perishable right?

5. OK, left field time. In closing, I want you to share something a little deeper. Laura - what humbles you?

The ability of the human body. Function and form, baby. Birth, breathing, orgasm, dance, touch, creativity. God was one hell of a physiologist eh? All witnessed in my working life. Its bloody incredible, I wouldn't miss it for the world. Who'd be dead eh?

Also...feeling loved, and loveable. This time last year I was on very shaky ground. I am glad to have arisen again, more aware of my humility and fragility. Feeling raised up with the help of others. Very humbling, feeling loved. I (now think that I) am worthy of love.

'Nuff said

If you’d like to join the fun, it’s simple.
Send me an email or a comment saying ‘interview me’.
I will then email you with five questions that I choose.
You can then answer them on your blog.
You should also post these rules along with an offer to interview anyone else who emails you or comments that they want to be interviewed.

Tick

Did I tell you I found another Xmas tree?

EXACTLY the same as the old one. Same box. Same plastic-cast Cypress foliage.

In an op-shop. For $4. (Ah, good old St Vinnie's, always a find or two.)

Brought it home, thinking even if its completely crap, its only $4.

It was bigger. Taller than me! Squee! A secret desire fulfilled!

Except it had one rather important row of branches missing.

Which just happened to be the same size as the largest branches from the old, shorter tree.

Cannibalise....Hey Presto! A new improved tree! We were doing the happy dance!

I also hung ornaments all over the new ornamental screen outside - they look purty!

I'm off to take it down right now. Happy 12th night everyone.

(sorry no photos, due to bad screen-ness of my camera - on my to-do list for the next two days off)

Happy New Year and 100th post!!!

Well, that says it all really.

Somehow I have now typed 100 messages to the universe, known as the internet.

Some of these message threads have floated out into space and connected with some of you. Like gossamer into the world wide web.

We are anchored at each end. Alerting the other to our presence through a gentle tug at the line now and then, occasionally catching another cross-thread between us and each sensing it, following it to a new friend.

This is the way that we share our daily/weekly/whenever communications.

I can assure you I had no idea how addictive I would find Blogland to be. Especially now I use Bloglines as a reader. 100+ feeds, sigh, yet I care about each of the lives I peer into.

I thirst for the latest news, creation, baby, musings, and updates on loved ones.

And don't get me started on the photography I have seen.

My life feels richer for 'knowing' new people through this medium. Most of us have never met, nor ever will.

But there you are. And here I am.

Thanks. For listening. For commenting. For writing and sharing. But most of all...for being there.

Does anyone fancy a random de-stash draw? You'd be helpin me out. Honest. Most of you have NO IDEA of the chaos I am sitting in.

(Continue to) Save me from myself.

You know the drill. Leave a comment.

You've got a week (until midnight next Friday night).

See ya, keep in touch!

Progress report (now with random photos)

Well, my to-do list still looks a bit sick. (I've taken a leaf out of Frogdancer's book and illustrated with holiday snaps- the photos are from the Italian leg of our trip last year, on the theme 'Rome wasn't built in a day') Catch more babies - Nope - not a one. Despite the best efforts of my colleagues to fling all multiparous and other quickies in my direction.

I had a day in the assessment unit - where it is frowned upon to catch babies unless you genuinely have ZERO time to whizz them around the corner.
I spent a shift with a delightful young primip who spoke minimal English (my French was fairly rusty, oui, c'est vrai). Her trace looked like crap (she was on the trace due to augmentation of labour) and the baby heartrate kept bottoming out, so needed to go for CS. Bummer. Near perfect gases. Cord only around the kid once, but had been in a spot that got squashed a lot and made the trace look crappy. The heartrate did take time to recover, more each time, and can only do that for so long, but it was disappointing for everyone. Baby came out squawking. Happy Maman and Papa. (Hopefully happier than this Maman below, Michaelangelo's finest work, the Pieta. Forget the Sistine chapel. This is it. Oh, and his David - who is also utterly magnificent.)
Today I came on to two delivered women. One was asking about circumcision for her new son - she wasn't too fussed whether it happened or not, just thought it was what you did. "In the olden days: we know better now, why cut something off when you can just wash it?" I told her. Thats the way God makes 'em, might as well leave them alone! Besids - he'll be the odd one out, it is so rare to find a circumcised boy under the age of 20 in Australia. (and thats a good thing) She was most relieved, it was one less thing to accomplish, and once I gave her the script to brush off enquiries from old-style pressure groups she was very happy to leave him as nature intended. We had a brief discussion about how to care for it (self-cleaning mostly, or just a swish until it pulls back fully and needs to be gently attended to by the fella himself) and then talked about Sci-fi fantasy books! (these look a bit like bookends to me)I was then sent to collect a multip who was a sure thing for a catch. A nice couple with a good history of spontaneous easy birth, including a multiple birth. Nix. Nada. Bupkiss. I even stayed behind nearly two hours after everyone else from my shift,but she went off the boil, even after rupture of membranes. I have just phoned - she had her son two hours after I left. I'm pleased for her, but sheesh. What does a midwife have to do? No-one else was scoring any babies either today, it was uncharacteristically slow, and two rooms were closed for water leaks! But I will be heading to the ward this week, and not be rostered back on LBS for a long few months. My catches remain at 45!
My perineal repairs remain at zero. No catches, no repairs. Easy equation. Not much call for it on the ward either (one hopes). Even less in clinics or VMS!

K2 CTG training remains unfinished - I have had no time to complete it at work this week, but can access it from home and will apparently be paid for the time I take from home. It is very interesting to do, I am refreshing and building on my knowledge. Its great.

The mentoring is all sytems go. We will meet soon, but had a brief catch-up at work, during which she beamed when I said Yes. A good sign. I have a few things planned to start with already. She is an interesting woman and its a good challenge for me professionally.
I have had a pretty definitive NO about getting some temporary work in the birth centre, more's the pity. Ah well, when one door opens another may open. I'll keep my ear to the ground for suitable continuum opportunities.
At home - I have been struggling a bit with a sore throat this week, along with an unwell hubby with a viral illness. Its not like him to take time off work, let alone go to the doctor and he has done both this week. He's not sleeping well, but I think it is starting to lift, and he is finally accepting that pain relief IS a necessary part of coping with sinus pain. He does allow a bit of cossetting every now and then.
I saw my Mum - who was not terribly cheerful or positive following her trip. We went out to a rose nursery near her place to get some rose bushes struck from a cutting I had taken of a stunning climbing rose 'Chrysler Imperial' with a heady fragrance. It was a favourite of my Dad's - I'm sure I've posted about it before. However the nurserywoman was most blunt - nuh, wrong time of year. Nuh, got no root stock to graft it onto. We finally dragged the month of January out of her as a good time to try again. Customer service training surely can't cost too much can it? Heavens above, at least be forthcoming with information - we were the only customers in the whole enormous place - it can't be too hard. To top off our frustration the nursery cafe where we had planned to have lunch was also not open on the day of our visit. I could feel a Mum-shaped meltdown coming on, so we wandered out to distract her and bought some new roses instead. Sigh. They also had some very pretty decorator pots which made a lovely advance birthday gift for Mum. Another gift off the pressie list.

Oh yeah, make a list, check it twice....that was on my to-do list. DONE!!!! Yay! Now to get to the shops and achieve the purchasing, or do the making......
Minimal crafting achieved this week, apart from... oooh I lie! I made two little button bracelets on Wed night at swimming. And I altered a polo shirt for work by appliqueing some pretty bright rose print cutouts over a very unattractive logo on the breast of a new white polo shirt, and adding a matching trim around the collar to cover up an orange stripe. I don't do orange. It doesn't suit me. But the alteration worked out well, and I wore it to work successfully (successful in the fashion stakes, not the baby-catching stakes, sigh). I even sold a bag this week! Which inspired me to stitch a few more. I may join Calamity Kim and make a craft pledge to make 3 small items a week in 2009. Just competing with myself, but also for etsy stock. (shop still empty, I'll blow the horn when its open). Its not like I don't have the stash!

Speaking of which...House still a tip? Check!

Purchased Xmas tree? Nope. The hunt continues, I seek them everywhere I go.
(BTW - we have absolutely NO idea what this item above is. They were fixed to the walls at regular intervals in many places in Rome, Siena and Florence and are at about head height to me. But we took a photo, and I love it 'cos it shows Don's hand. I love his hands)

More op-shopping. I found a blue cowgirl + tiara hat! I need it. Truly. The theme for our staff Xmas party is Country and Western! See - I DO need it. And the matching shirt, which hubby will claim when I'm finished with it. We also found some gorgeous Bally shoes for Steff. $10. Worn once. Very stylish black and cream loafers with sedate tassles. Di-vine. Italian leather designer shoes. We were suitably stoked (I bet Kelley is very jealous - do you have teeny-tiny micro feet? Cos Steff does!) And a sassy tote bag for fun. It is a rare day when our local Vinnies doesn't give some sugar!

Enough rambling on .... Be good.

Ramblin' on

I have managed to find my way back to the 'New Post' button. Phew!



I have made an actual list of things to excuse my absence, well...more like things that happened when I was away from the keyboard and I feel I might tell you about.



I have been op-shopping (clearly I desperately need more stuff in this house). Buttons galore, some cast glass pieces (imitating cut glass) that I seem to be collecting. Do they have a name as a style? Please let me know.I wonder why I like them? They remind me of my Nanna's sugar bowl which I have and use daily. I'm sure that the sugar bowl is absolutely nothing special in terms of value, probably a fancier looking piece from a department or chain store, but it has always been in use with the Sydney Harbour Bridge spoon from my earliest memories (at least the mid-60s). It has the lovely quality of looking beautiful (esp when freshly washed) but as solid as a rock...let me take a picture (oh bugger, now I'll have to wash it....might as well photograph the rest of the haul....semi-prepared blogging...grumble...grumble). They were all as cheap as chips to buy, but I do like them.Here ya go. I use this one as a pin dish (it may very well be exactly that).



More Wild Women have been crafted, including some brown ones. I am not a brown person. It looks hideous on me. Its not 'my colour'. So I used to naturally shy away from it as a craft choice....but lately I have realised that it was cutting out a whole range of palette for me to play with, and it does combine well as a neutral with all sorts of colours. I don't have to wear it to use it. I'm pleased with these women. I haven't named them yet...But they please me inordinately.

I went to an Enjo party last week (sigh, don't get me started on party plan selling). To be sociable, and because I love the party holder dearly. I knew her late mother, and now the daughter, M and I have ended up doing nursing together (sort of, she was the semester ahead) and midwifery in the same class. When her mum died in 1997 some friends were asked to make quilt squares for a memory quilt for the family. I hadn't started quilting then and I am embarassed to recall my efforts, but I made two blocks for the quilt and sent them off, but never saw the finished quilt. M showed me the quilt at the party. Its huge! And I was relieved that my squares weren't as badly finished off as I recalled.



I was at my daughter's swimming competition last weekend and for some reason (anticipated boredom?) as I ran out of the door I grabbed something to do while sitting for hours. It was knitting. KNITTING!!!! Good Lord! What possessed me? Anyhoo....Using op-shop chunky wool and 9mm needles an elf hat emerged. Quite randomly. For a creamy-beige elf. No pattern, no clue, made it up as I went along. The daughter came third in her race too. I continued the illusion of knitting the next day and attempted to make a headband for the wild-haired son - either his head is gonna have to shrink or a cold, smaller child will find herself with an ear warmer. I suspect the latter. See I can actually knit, just randomly. I even knitted the headband in the round on DPNs!! Double Pointed Needles. Are you impressed? It was a complete pain in the ass, but I'm stubborn. I thought about unpicking it, but instead I got it off the needles ASAP. It's not completely finished, but meh, what's a few buttons. I even crocheted the flower thingy, with the last of the wool. Oy veh. I am NOT dedicated to knitting. Can you tell?



I caught up with a long-lost sister on Sunday (well, not quite lost, but you know...). She is doing well at this end of a very stressful and difficult year, and is enthralled with her new puppy, a pedigree Shi-tszu with a very long name, Poppy for short. Very cute. Sooooooooo cute. Did I mention that she is cute? No photo, sorry, but she is cream, gold and sable saddled with symmetrical markings. She matches the long-haired Burmese cat. And the furnishings. Deliberately. She is just what my sister needed, and I am so pleased to see her looking content.




We saw a movie 'Burn After Reading' on the weekend too. It was really good, hilarious and wicked. Are people really as completely and relentlessly unfaithful to their spouses as depicted in the movies? Or just in Washington? I know, I know, its just a movie, but it did strike me as weird. There was only one sympathetic character in the film. Brad Pitt was so funny as a bonehead gym worker. Frances McDormand was brave and wonderful in her role. George Clooney was as adorable, but despicable as the sex-obsessed public servant. John Malkovich played the uptight, pernickety husband to perfection and Tilda Swinton was revoltingly good and believable as the cold wife of Malkovich's character. Recommended if you like quirky, off the wall plots.



Work has been good too, absorbing and challenging. My baby drought has continued, I haven't caught a baby myself for about 5-6 weeks. I cared for 2 families with stillborns last weekend, they were so sweet and tiny, their parents were devastated to see the end of their hopes for those children. The memories we make for them to keep are so important, and I'm always delighted to work with midwives with great photography skills, or presentation skills who will help create worthy records and mementos of that short precious time with the baby. Parents are always so touched to receive the gifts of quilts, clothes, teddies etc that are provided for their little ones, often by families who experienced such a loss themselves and in memory of their own baby. Grandparents who provided teeny little teddy bears 4" high can keep a photo of their grandchild's perfect little hand on teddy's tummy, just the right size for a tiny 23 weeker. Its a privilege to care for them.





I'm starting to make plans for next year at work. I'm talking to my manager about rotations to a birth centre on-site, that provides care across the continuum for low-risk women in a team or group practice model. They work shifts and regular on-call, do their own education sessions, and provide short-term postnatal care on-site (<24hrs) and do their own visiting home postnatal care. I am looking forward to seeing more spontaneously labouring women. Fingers crossed for my rotations!


Last thing! I went to craft today with all my old friends. They are all besotted with my Wild Women (what's not to like?) and want me to lead a class in making them, so I will find a date in early December for that. We made some silk 'paper' with silk 'topping' and added threads. I'm quite pleased with it. It should be a cover for a new small journal, or maybe something else. As I said at craft this morning - I may use it straight away, or I may find it again when I am 72 and I hope I remember the day when I made it and the company of such dear friends. And the friends I shared it with online.

Right! Consider yourselves caught up!

Blushing now

Ooh, thanks Lesley and Alby.

You have each sent me this honour currently doing the rounds. Forgive me if I don't send it back directly (although you both deserve it).

The only catch is that I have to pass it on to SEVEN others (by making a comment and telling them I've done it, and to come and get the pic from my blog, then pass it on, citing me as their source).

I have 63 feeds on my bloglines (!) and some of them have already received it - but I suppose that doesn't matter really as, if I think they're brillante (brilliant?), then they just are.

Lets start in Oz then. I've been having fun and making plans with Frogdancer and Widget this week - teacher tag x 2.

I received a package from the generous Victoria this week. She was kindly giving away prints of her insightful and quirky collage art. My loyalty can't be bought, but I'm really thrilled to receive these pieces from her. Tagged!

Next - the wicked and awesome Kelley, who tells it like it is. I laugh and I cry reading her blog. She won't be surprised...it is all due to her awesomeness.

Hmm, three to go. Jess has already received it, but tough. I'm a fan.

As a nod in the direction of midwifery I will nominate my friend in Alaska - Lisa. She is a terrific midwife and knitter - I'm so jealous of her knitting ability, and I dream of being such an accomplished health professional as she is. Brilliant (and tagged).

Finally, I also really enjoy the gentleness of Jenny's blog. Her sweet little dolls are just amazing. And I am nostalgic for her stay at home life - I didn't fully appreciate it when I had it. And although my house could never be that tidy, I hope it is as much a home as hers clearly is.

Speaking of tidy houses, sigh. Mine is definitely not tidy currently, much to my husband's annoyance. I had some fun late last week preparing a package for a friend who just needed one. I had a great time, and rediscovered stuff I hadn't seen in ages. But in terms of denting the stash...it didn't go close!

I have been having a clothes blitz lately, and threw out quite ruthlessly. I can now fit (nearly) all of my clothes in the drawers and cupboards. I should take a leaf out of Widget's book and get organised. Unfortunately op-shops have been calling quite loudly lately -and boy have we scored! I have found some really sweet pieces of moulded glass, sugar bowls and the like that I have been happy to adopt. Some great shirts for craft fabric, some vintage dresses with beautiful English lawn. And Stephanie found some great pieces of clothing including 2 jackets, a sassy skirt and a sweet top.

I am trying to get better at throwing out something everytime something begs to come home with me. And I will get better at it, or be smothered in the attempt.

I have a social week coming up. It is a year this week since our class finished the midwifery course. I have been a midwife for a year!!! Yay!! A bunch of us are going out for dinner on Thursday night to catch up. Some have had babies, some have new jobs, some are working as midwives, some not. It will be great to see them, especially the ones I haven't seen for a while.

Happy 1st Anniversary Curtin Midwives 2006-2007!

Hubby and I are going to an art show on Friday night, and then away for a grown-up night on Saturday night. Can't wait!

See ya!

Picture diary

Thanks for the comments. I read and appreciate every one. When I asked if anyone was still there it meant I hoped you hadn't stopped visiting because there was nothing new to read! I must say since I started using bloglines my blog reading has been greatly simplified. Instead of rabidly going to every site just in case I missed something new, now I can see instantly who has posted and I can relax about all the rest. I am spending less time on the computer, but am still in touch and up-to-date. Phew.

Which leaves more time for sewing!!!! I have been going a bit mad lately and loving it!

OK I promised photos. First - from my birthday. Here is the cake. Black Forest Cake. YUM.

And my oldest friend called late in the day and came by to join us for dinner. We hardly ever get to see each other any more - she lives an hour or so away and now I work shifts with less holidays its too easy to let time slip by. But we manage 1-2 visits per year and it is always such a hoot to see her.

We met when she moved to our area at the start of year 5. For the only time in my childhood or since I was picked to choose a softball team. Such a responsibility! I was always picked last so I knew the anguish of waiting to hear your name spoken. So I chose all the kids who usually waited and waited, including all the interesting kids who were new or who had accents or different coloured skins. It is a decision I have never regretted, least of all because it brought Bobbie into my life. We were inseparable from that moment on. It still feels like that. Can you tell?

I was her bridesmaid at her first wedding. The first quilts I owned were made by her for each of my children - I still have them and treasure them. She is such an inspiration to me. She went back to uni to complete her high school, and became an environmental scientist. She is a grandmother now, and still her own self. I just love her. It was so good to see her.

Here is a very bad shot of the Michael Buble concert, which is badly out of focus but conveys something of the atmosphere. Jeez it was a great concert.

Here is a quick excited photo of my sister and I in the audience. Even though its crooked, I like this shot. She is not usually so pale, she's been unwell. Yep, that is the favourite pink cardigan of the moment getting another outing!

Something else exciting happened last week. I received my labels. See? Its a name that a family friend used to call me (my family call me by my middle name) I accidentally ordered iron-on ones (sigh) which don't necessarily suit every fabric I use to make a bag, but they still look very satisfying to have on my products. Even if sewn a little rustically.

Speaking of rustic, here is the bag I just had to make on Friday instead of doing housework (I don't recall making an active choice - was the housework ever a realistic option? ;P )

I had found the orange embroidered jeans in a favourite op-shop on Thursday. They fitted Steff but she felt she wouldn't wear them. Ditto the black chunky cord Diesel jeans we had found a few weeks ago. So....she requested a shopping bag. Et voila!

I was very brave and even put in an internal zipped pocket - my first time - piece of cake. Everything on this bag was chosen for recycledness (is that a word?). The outer fabric, the lining fabrics, the zip, everything had been used before. I'm really pleased with it. It wears my label outside and hers inside!

Which brings me to the weekend....sigh. It was an oasis. I took a healing doll that I had started back in February sometime, that I got stuck on. It was meant to be my inner child, but she looked so vulnerable that I just couldn't move forward with her alone. She needed longer arms to reach out to people. I was a long lanky kid (snort), and while the hair colour was about right, and she had big brown eyes I felt stuck. I knew that if I took her with me to a safe place she would be able to evolve into herself.

We chose messages from a set that spoke to us. Mine were about not believing and living old, negative messages, and how I could create new beliefs about myself, about how I am alright NOW. These tapped into some thought patterns I needed to change. Remember don't believe everything you think ..... So I set to work.

We learned about the orphan archetype and the pros and cons of examining the orphan within us all. We heard the story of "the Ugly Duckling". We journalled. The opening sentence was "I want..." A very powerful tool. We danced through a guided meditation through a four part garden with gates dividing the areas. We experienced the long hard winter that precedes transformation and growth. Rocks for grief, sticks for anger, water for despair, and sand for feeling depleted. We then went for a silent meditative walk about the bush. It was the winter solstice and people all over the world were also engaging in that exercise simultaneously. We were encouraged to see if anything called to us on our nature walk and to collect them for inclusion in our dolls or journalling. The sticks of anger had called me during the meditation. It was time to examine their purpose.

The other women had mostly not made the dolls before and we all had kits in front of us for a new doll. So did I. So I made a new one as well as working on my inner child doll. She had come with me as plain Jane. I was called that a lot as a child. This weekend I made her/myself blossom.

I used the sturdy sticks I collected to first of all give plain Jane a backbone. Next I entwined some curved sticks to her to give her longer arms to reach out for help and comfort. Next she needed to stand taller, so some very strong branches were bound to her short legs. These new limbs were bound in a tartan that reminded me of the little tartan pinafores I wore as a child - with a plain cotton top and a beautiful pleated skirt. They were worn with a pretty white blouse and a cardigan over the top. My new doll seemed more confident already. She had been mousy and brown before, and I look hideous in brown. She wasn't happy being brown. As the dove-grey and green tartan strengthened her she seemed happier. Suddenly I knew she needed more green. A scrap of sequinned green spoke to me. I bound this across her heart. There were some leaves that filled a gap or two, then she sighed contentedly. At last, you are getting to the heart of me. Returning to the treasure chest I found a small sculpted baby, painted gold. This touched a very deep chord. The little one was immediately tucked next to her heart. Scraps of green gingham, more layers of beautiful dyed green cotton with leaf prints, a few more sequins, a tie or two, more hair, a flower for blossoming happiness, a jewel or two, a few pearls, following our instincts. Then someone brought me an amazing gift. There, in a small velvet covered matchbox, was a tiny baby with a message in the box that read "I love you just the way you are". It was just the message she/we needed to hear. She held a stick to acknowledge the rage at her mistreatment, but it was softened by a growth of green, as she didn't want it to define her. It now looks like a wand to achieve transformation. A friend across the table said, you realize, don't you, that she is Mother Earth. A bell rang somewhere. Many people call me an Earth Mother midwife. Others have called me a Demeter figure. But of course. My inner child had blossomed into a manifestation of something that feels very natural to me. An earth mother. I was profoundly moved by the whole experience and can barely take my eyes off her. She is just right. I had never imagined that I would create something as beautiful as she is. As green as she is. But she is "No More Plain Jane" now. And I love her just the way she is.

The white doll I am holding is my midwife warrior I made in the first healing doll workshop I attended. She is full of symbolism and has a long story too. Her new red sister is also related to the meditation. She is a goddess of rage, who trails her anger behind her and has no problem expressing it. I think her story is one for another day....

Here is our group with their dolls at the end of the weekend. We all found it a very powerful and symbolic exercise, an oasis in our busy lives as mothers of children with special needs, some bereaved mothers. We had danced, including a belly dancing session, journalled, ate great food, talked, laughed, cried, discovered, meditated, slept and relaxed and shared an incredibly intimate weekend.

I am very lucky to have access to this type of workshop. It is a lifeline for me, a tool to have an inner life that allows my inside to match my outside. This doll making is a stunning exercise when taken as a whole 30 hour journey in a supported psychotherapeutic environment with trusted friends. And now I entrust the sharing of it with you, dear reader.

Peace and love.

Catch up

OK so I've been a bit busy to blog in any proper sense of the word, but I have been taking a few photos, and thinking of what to blog.


Here is my reprobate son sunning himself in Hollywood on his balcony at a 5 star hotel. Any resemblance to a movie star is purely contrived (but he is a bit good looking). Overlooking this. Poor darling. I wonder what the other poor starving Aussie students are doing? Chances are they were not livin' large (ish) playing Magic the Gathering at a Pro Tournament - which is what Patty was doing! He had dreamed of it since he was 11 years old - this is him and his best mate at age 12, playing Magic. I think Patty is winning their game.His 12 year old birthday cake was a reproduction of a Magic card - a Shivan Dragon!! Good Lord he actually worked at it, and he won the qualifier tournament. He is now ranked 348th in the world (I think). He is capable of buckling down sometimes...I wish he displayed the same discipline at all his studies .... sigh ... although he is improving. He has reached that interesting age where (finally) he is putting in above minimum effort and getting back better grades - Who'd have thought? He is back BTW - with gifts! He's learning!

What else? I have made Steff a hat. She chose the fabric and pattern. It turned out pretty OK. She's been a bit in the wars lately, with one thing and another, achey here, a lot of podiatry there (weird feet that kid's got!) so this evening she has had an early shower and got settled into the beanbag in her new cat PJs. I'll have to stretch her tendons /torture her again soon. Its no fun.


My roses are nice at the moment. Here is a bunch of those gorgeous Chrysler Imperials that I cut and took to all of my Mums out on the visiting midwife service while working on Mother's Day. The car smelled lovely.


And here is a selection from the garden yesterday, including my new one 'Mother's Love', which I received for Mother's day (the pale pink/white on the left). The apricot one is the new Olivia Newton-John rose, pretty but not very scented :( The large mauve one is a Lucina rose - the midwife's rose. It is one I use as an ID when visiting blogs. I really like the little French Hen that lives on my outdoor table.


You know I promised to be good at the craft fair? Well . . . . I was! I did buy some stuff, but it all fitted into my handbag! Are you impressed? I was. You can see how crowded the craftroom is getting. It looks a bit better currently than it does pictured below. I'm not showing you the worst corner.


I bought a stitchery pattern stating the completely obvious. Can you read it?
It says 'You can never have too many handbags or too many friends'. But of course!



I couldn't resist some little beads from a Chinese bead man. And some fun necklace kits made entirely of buttons. I couldn't decide between the black one or the red one so guess how many of them came home with me?And another bag of buttons that I probably paid too much for but it was my day for making frivolous purchases if I wanted to. Buttons really are quite yummy to play with. I don't know anyone who can resist running their fingers through a pile of them, and sorting them into sets. I saw my sister and resisted buying anything from her stand, although she did make some pretty interesting stamped demo stuff with glazes and such. We did lunch instead.


I saw some yummy bags and patterns, and only bought ONE small collection of fabric - I'm a bit drawn to chocolate and pink at the moment. I'm wearing a lot of pink too. I bought a really lovely deep rose pink / fuchsia colour 3/4 sleeve cardigan a few weeks ago. Yummy. I've worn it a couple of times already.



I have been using buttons a bit lately - I found a handspun, handknitted cardigan in an op-shop recently for $4, yes FOUR dollars. It was too cheap to leave there. Someone had made it with love, and skill, and had taken pride in it, so it had to come home with me.Cream is not really a colour that looks fabulous on me, but I honour its creation. It had very ugly rubber buttons on it, which I removed. I then handwashed it very carefully and replaced the buttons with ones selected by two of my sisters, who had a very pleasant time sorting through my button collection, choosing for the cardigan as well as my niece's bag I showed you last time (she loved it, by the way, its already in use.) I now wear the cardie in the mornings when it is chilly, as I potter about, especially as I sit at the computer reading blogs.


I am in my last two weeks of VMS now. I think I will miss the autonomy of zipping about the suburbs, consulting on my own. I will miss the yummy babies. I have had some completely edible ones lately. Oh, young Mohammed today melted my butter completely, I actually asked his Dad for a spoon so I could eat him all up!!!! I'm glad I get to see him again tomorrow. His four big sisters are unlikely to let me get too far down the street with him though. Sigh. Ooh - he really was adorable. I am quite a connoisseur of babies and he is a very fine baby!


Young Ella last week had us in stitches, unfortunately at her own expense. She was yelling lustily, as most young ladies (and gentlemen) do when being undressed for weighing, and as I put her on the scales she somehow took a fistful of her own hair and pulled. And pulled again. And kept pulling. Poor little mite. I immediately tried to undo her tiny fist, but you know how babies just won't let go? Sigh, poor little chicken, she kept looking very surprised and indignant, and would then pull again - bringing on a fresh bout of screaming! It took about 30 seconds to gently unwind her fist, by which time she had caused quite a red patch on her scalp! OOOOWWWW! Her Mum was fantastic with her. She had had a really easy natural birth at term, was breastfeeding like a champion, very easily and naturally, nipples holding up well. The good news continued as Ella had gained 3oz in a day - which made the scale related ordeal worth it!


I had a little fellow last week who wasn't doing so well. Mum's third baby, she was nearly 40, her milk was taking a while to come in, his poo hadn't changed colour at four days of age. When I weighed him he had lost heaps of weight on day 5 of life (12.5%), and hadn't started gaining yet. I sent him in to the hospital to be checked out, as babies must be examined if they lose more than 10% of birth weight (most lose around 6-7%). It may indicate a heart condition, or a tongue tie that means they can't remove much milk from Mum's breast. I followed him up today and found he did have a tongue tie, and was only transferring 4mls of milk at a feed! That's why he hadn't been pooing the right colour - it was barely getting through! Yet Mum's breasts were full of milk. She started pumping to remove the milk for him, and shoved it down his neck with a teat that delivered it more easily into his mouth. He is to have a frenotomy next week (where a surgeon nicks the frenulum under the tongue) and will be reintroduced to the breast after that, when it should be much easier to move his tongue effectively. I feel bad that I missed it when I saw him on two visits. He wasn't damaging the nipple, so I wasn't looking for it, and when I observed attachment he was moving and sucking in an apparently effective way, and I observed swallowing too! I'm glad he is turning the corner.


I've learned heaps in visiting midwifery. Its a matter of putting it all together, which I feel I am getting better at doing. I've had student midwives, and today I've had a graduate midwife with me. We toss around ideas, and at each house (as we drive away) I ask them if they would say or do anything different, and we discuss the things we have just seen, or houses we have been at!


There are so many delightful families out there in parenting land from all different cultures. Pets getting to know the new baby, siblings squirming for a front row seat at the action, or by Mum's side as she feeds the new one. Half naked men answering the door sleepily, and leading us back to their bedrooms, where we then ALL roll about on the bed, observing feeds, feeling the fundus, checking out the stitches, weighing breasts in hands, with the man in bed too, helping them all to understand the new family member, encouraging a love-in in the early days that will hopefully carry over to a harmonious family life. Its an intimate job.



I love it!